Well, it’s Andy’s Annual Abnegation – as the clouds and chill roll in he rolls out, this year to Thailand.
In preparation for his travels he methodically went through a checklist of preparation: packing the right amount of clothes (enough to be dressed while still having bragging rights on packing lightly see his blog), the specific destination he was headed to (I kept hitting him in the crotch every time he said Bangkok – it never dawned on him to schedule swimming lessons on the breast stroke), the proper timing (over jet lag in time for a writing competition? check; back in time for my work Christmas break? check; scoping out the best Thai massage places? check; planning a sub-trip to Cambodia? check; accidentally and apologetically missing a concert he bought me for my birthday? whoops).
Meanwhile, I have been preparing for his departure by planning things to do in his absence (find a date to go with me to Billy Joel? check; fill up every waking moment of my day with activities? check; nights too? check; accidentally double booking more than one day? check; go grocery shopping and prepare meals for myself? hahahahah).
I am now really afraid to be home alone. Not because of noises or potential bad guys. No, I am afraid because I now have responsibilities. What day is the cleaner coming? Did I remember to feed the cats or clean their litter boxes? How am I supposed to make myself coffee in the morning before having a cup of coffee in the morning? How long can the cats go without having their litter boxes cleaned? Why are they trying to chew on my fingers? Andy being gone for the next two weeks is mostly an exercise in me proving to myself I am not a shit show. I wish myself luck.
I drove him to the airport tonight and spoke of getting home, eating dinner and drifting off to sleep by 7PM. By 8 I texted him that I was headed to bed. It’s midnight. I just shut off the Great British Bake Off and am blogging about the fact that I am not traveling. I may need more than luck.